I realize your time comes at a premium, so I'm willing to make sacrifices.

I have a friend who is undergoing some large life changes.  I should be by her side for those, but I can't - ergo, I should be on the phone every second she needs me, but I'm not.  I haven't called in a long while, because every time I think about calling, I only have 5 minutes, or I'm semi-busy doing this or that, and my thinking is 'Well, I don't want to short change her, and I don't want to risk having to cut her off, etc. etc.'.  This is fine and all, to a point.  The point I'm at, however, is sacrificing any contact at all, just waiting for that perfect moment.  Newsflash to self: it's not going to happen.

I realized the same was true of my blog.  I know I should write in here... why?

1. Several of you have told me you enjoy reading it - who am I to deny you that pleasure?
2. I need to set down some finite bit of my life somewhere, otherwise at the end of the day, it's gone. That's that. And someday I'll be gone too.  Not that this is some lasting legacy that will inspire generations for centuries to come, but (here's my morbid way of thinking creeping in) if I died, I think it'd be nice to hear my "voice" every now and then.  Or maybe not, but it's nice to have the option.  Being on the other end of friends passing on has taught me that options are nice.
3. I have witty things to say, dammit. This stuff is just too much to stay cooped up in my brain.
4. It's a goal of mine, and I fall short on goals more often than I'd like.  

Anyhow, I've been neglecting the blog for the same timing reasons listed above, and enough is enough.  (Note for a sense of resolution: I called the above friend and apologized for being terrible and told her that she could have as many 5 minute increments as she wanted.  Not the best offer, I know, but I do my best, and at least I'm always honest.)

Several random things I've been wanting to place in here:

Thought this article was interesting. 

What do you think?  Should the proposal be a surprise, or a negotiation?

I think the current trend toward the negotiation really does make it easier on the guy, as it takes out the most difficult parts for them - the possibility that she'll say no, and the difficulty in deciding on things, such as the ring, whether or not she'd like a public proposal, etc.

But for women... is this a step towards taking control in our own lives, or taking away some of the magic of one of the few moments in our lives where we really get to feel like a princess?

I go back and forth on this issue.  Part of me (the part that still finds it semi-impossible that some boy would actually want to maary me) wants the surprise, wants to be swept away, wants it totally out of my control, something that's just *done* for me.  The other part of me (the control-freak pragmatist part) wants to make sure that it's acceptable: that it's a ring I like, that it's not some gawdy cheesy deal, that if there are people around, it's in the right setting (i.e. NOT at a sporting event, NOT in the middle of a shopping mall, etc.)  Maybe the fact that I'm writing this in my blog - that I know my boyfriend reads, on occasion - makes me fall into the negotiation category, but I'd like to think that I've still got a bit of the former sentiment in me.

Another thing I thought was interesting was my relationship with coffee; this hit me as I was pouring myself a cup this morning.

I woke up dragging, so initially I put the coffee on to help wake me up.  Time and time again, coffee has been my morning savior - to the point, now, where I can actually drink decaf and still wake up a bit (albeit not as much as if I were consuming it's caffeinated counterpart) just because of the mental association 'put coffee in mouth = eyes open'.  I bring coffee with me to class every morning, hoping that this will show that I'm doing my very best to stay awake during an 8:15am discussion of transdermal absorption.  The coffee cup in hand has almost become a morning accessory.

However, by the time I got around to my coffee, nearly 2 hours had passed - I had showered, gotten dressed, the whole deal.  But I still wanted my cup of coffee.  It was a relaxed, cloudy morning that I needed to spend attending to various tasks, and coffee seemed the natural choice of companion: sip coffee slowly, enjoy grey weather, methodically check off to-do list.  

Then there's the coffee shop, which I'll be heading to as soon as I finish this blog post.  Where did people meet before the rise of the coffee shop?  I mean it, please answer that - I'm too young to know.  For all of my life, the phrase has been "Let's grab coffee" or some sort of variation.  I suppose there was always grabbing a drink before that, but what to do if you were too young/a teetotaler/meeting a potential employer?  Anyhow, the coffee shop has provided us the go-to location for meetings with both old and new acquaintances.  A sip of your Americano provides you an extra three seconds to think of the perfect answer to an interview question; a long drag on the macchiato fills in the awkward silence that can arise between two people who haven't seen each other in years and are now leading vastly different lives.  Or, in my case, it provides you the perfect alternative to a meal (since America is so driven by food that every meeting must be accompanied by some sort of sustenance) when the only time you're free to meet is early afternoon.

Coffee is dispensed for morning chats, Sunday crosswords, at wakes, for hangovers, and at most social functions I can think of.  It just hit me this morning, as I poured my coffee for a much different scenario than that for which I had intended, that it's very versatile.  I just wanted to ponder on that a bit, thank you all for your attention.

Off for my coffee date now.  No more month long gaps (and I mean it as much now as every time before).